Mama, sing my song

 Johanna Maria, my prize

With brown hair and chocolate eyes

I thank God that you are mine

My Johanna

You have freckles on your nose

And from your head to your toes

I will always hold you close

My Johanna

Johanna Maria

Josie girl how I love ya

You are a treasure sent from God to us

My Johanna

Johanna, so kind and witty

You're as smart as you are pretty

A hard worker you'll always be

My Johanna

A great big sister you are

 You're kind with a great big heart

Shining brighter than the starts

My Johanna

Johanna Maria

Josie girl how I love ya

You are a treasure sent from God to us

My Johanna

Johanna I hope and I pray 

That you would know Joy every day

Love and honor God always

My Johanna

And no matter what may be

Stay so close to your family

We love you so massively

My Johanna

Johanna Maria

Josie girl how I love ya

You are a treasure sent from God to us

My Johanna

6 and a half!

 Boy... i just read through the last post in here right before you turned 6. how things have changed since then! right after your birthday...and i mean RIGHT, like March 15 the day after we had a big party with all the extended family in California, our world shut down with the Covid-19 pandemic. On our long ride home, all the restaurants were closed! We were able to do it in a single shot and got home super late, but wooo then everything was crazy as we had to quarantine for a few weeks. it was hard! and then the "2 weeks to not overwhelm hospitals" has turned into 6 months and counting...so there's that. and then this past week or so, there has been crazy fires in Oregon. and now the smoke is crazy and we literally have the worst air quality in the world, so we have been locked inside. 2020 man its been a wild ride. and for another HUGE change- we have decided to stay put at Ita and Abuelo's house for another 5ish years. I know...we sound crazy, but God just kept shutting door after door and we realized His answer was "not right now". So, here we are! You just started BSF again last night- virtual edition thanks to Covid. and you are homeschooling 1st grade! You are a really great reader and are working hard at writing! you are very interested in the actual learning, but not big on sitting down to practice writing or doing worksheets ;) We spend about an hour and a half 3 days a week, 1 day each week is a field trip learning experience where you just write a quick story after, and then 1 day a week you go to "Grandma School" where she is drilling in all the language arts and teaching you piano! We have a little keyboard here at home for you to practice on, but it is sitting on top of the washing machine because Zeke won't leave it alone haha. You and June still spend a good chunk of your days playing together- especially Barbie in the Barbie room which is always a disaster- or as Abuelo says, "Did another hurricane come through the Barbie room?" Really cool story- you were intent on saving up $100 to buy a Barbie dream house this summer. Dad and I were going to spend the other $80 to help you buy it. And right as you had enough money- like the same week- we got a text from Miss Annette saying to check out a free pile by her house on our way over for house church (yes, house church with the Brooks and Kukis families because of Covid ha) and guess what was in the free pile?! A beautiful Barbie Dream House with the elevator and furniture and everything... what!? All we have to do is fix up the stairs, but we might just make a ladder to keep more room for your furniture. So now you are crazy wanting to spend your money on everything and just saying "I just want to spend my money on anything!" and trying to take it everywhere we go and I keep trying to get you to save it for something special hahah. man, thanks for being the oldest child. I know it is rough for mom and dad to learn all of our parenting on you... maybe we will have a better idea how to handle money with your siblings, but it has all been new to us! OH and you lost 2 teeth! Your grandparents kept slipping you tooth fairy money in an envelope every night before your first fell out...and then gave you like $15 when it actually came out... spoiled i tell you! and with the second, tooth fairy didn't make it the first night and had to give some extra (a golden dollar) to make up for it ;) but you look ADORABLE with your 2 teeth missing smile <3 <3 you really really want to take a gymnastics class... and i want to let you, but right now with Covid they won't let any siblings in the waiting room so i would have to schedule your class around when dad isn't working and it would just steal too much family time, so we will hopefully get you in one as soon as all the covid restrictions are gone! you hate wearing your mask- like always telling us you don't want to go anywhere where you have to wear it. poor baby! i am so sorry this is happening and that it is delaying your gymnastics class, taking away homeschool connection this semester, and even took away all the summer mom's group play dates because they literally closed all parks. i pray so much for you and your future- i pray that your generation isn't paralyzed with fear because of all this! God is so much bigger than any sickness and He has it all in His hands! Never be afraid, my girl. In the Bible, remember when Paul got bitten by a poisonous snake after his ship wreck? and he just shook it off and carried on in His work for the Lord- serving others by gathering the fire wood. God created this world and He has full control over all nature and science! Anyway... you are tall- you love to measure yourself on me and say "I am just over your boobies!" how are you that tall at 6 years old?! You LOVE being a big sister and always beg to get Zeke out of his crib in the mornings. you spend a lot of time playing with him and i just love it! you ask me often when we will have another baby and when I say I'm not sure I want a 4th, you say I really need to and tell me how much you love babies. You also talk a lot about having your own babies when you're older and how you want to have 100 and how I will help you and babysit them when you feel overwhelmed or need to go shopping, etc. You are still such a mama's girl and cry when I leave you and always want to be close- you spend a lot of time following me around and I go a little crazy and tell you to go play outside haha. What else..? You obsess over TV time and your "one candy" each day... i don't know how to best handle that and make sure its not something you always struggle with feeling deprived of. learning as i go here ;) you also love to sleep upstairs with your Ita and Abuelo and you LOVE your cousins and we are so thankful for living here so that you get to see them so much more often than you otherwise would. You love audio books and will spend at least an hour a day listening to one..usually the Ramona Quimby series! You love your time over at Grandma Sandee's house! and you love all your aunts and uncles and are so good at socializing with adults- it is the best. That is all I can think of for now... you are SO much fun and it is such an honor to get a front row seat to your life and watch you grow into a beautiful, Godly girl. i love you so much, Johanna Maria my prize <3 < 3<3 

almost 6!

Sweet little Josie. You are only a few weeks away from turning 6. Where has the time gone? I am blown away at how grown up you seem. You use such big words and say things that I just wonder how you even know. You are reading and slowly but surely getting faster! You are an amazing artist. You were dead set on getting a "bob with bangs" haircut and you did and it is the cutest thing ever- really coming into your own fashion wise! You are very motivated to earn $ and are willing to work hard for it with doing extra chores. You are so imaginative and engage your sister in pretend play 80% of our days ;) You are still such a mama's girl- confident in going to Sunday school and BSF or with your dad or grandmas, but other than that...lots of tears! And you cannot stand being home when I am not- always the melt downs when I try to leave to go out for a date with dad or a mom's night out. I love that you are so attached to me. Sometimes, it feels overwhelming how you talk to me allllllll the time. Like seriously- I have to tell you to give me some quiet time. And I have to listen and engage in the conversation because I want you to know that I care about all you have to say haha. Exhausting. But I *pray* that this turns into you telling me everything going on in your beautiful mind as a teenager and walking me through all your adventures in dating and wanting to come have lunch with me AT LEAST once or twice a week after you're all grown up and moved away. Actually, you really really want us to build our house with a little apartment that you can move into after you grow up. and we totally are. right now, it will just be an unfinished area or maybe a playroom. and then eventually Ita and Abuelo will move into it (we think?). and then its for you or your siblings! such a fun thing to be able to do- to be able to bless you guys with free rent as young adults and during college. or even as newlyweds or when you have your first baby or two! and I am so excited to get to have my babies close to me <3 it would be so hard if you up and moved across the country. I would miss you so so so so so much. you are my constant shadow! you aren't very into sports... we have been taking swimming lessons and you are doing amazing being brave, but you have zero interest in trying any other sports- especially team sports ha. you also take your dad's First Tee class and love that, but you mainly loved one little girl (Chloe) who we just found out won't be in your same class this next season..so we will see how it goes! You love to be upstairs with your Ita and Abuelo and get sad talking about moving. We will *hopefully* be moved in by the time you turn 7, so we are letting you kiddos enjoy lots of special time with them. it was such a gift to see your relationships with them become so strong! We always thought we would move way quicker, and promised you a cat for your 6th bday.... not gonna happen til we move! so we are getting you a beta fish this year. I am excited to see you take responsibility for your own pet :) Let's see... you became a big sister again this year! You are SO sweet with baby Zeke. You carry him around all over the place and are always asking if you can have a turn with him now. You love babies in general- you love to come and serve in the church nursery with mom & dad and love to be around babies- in homeschool connection, you would stay in the nursery to "direct" play hahaha. I loved babies as a little girl too- I foresee motherhood in your future! and I can't wait. you can't either- you always confirm that I will babysit your kids for you when you need a break. I love that! you have been saying some hilarious things lately- like the other day, I was wearing my fav purple glasses and was dressed to leave and my outfit was mostly black. and you said, "I am not saying this to say that you look bad. but are you going to wear those glasses?" and then you went on to explain that I should switch to the black ones haha. and you were talking about how if people were in the desert and dying of thirst, they could drink their own pee to survive (so gross and why my 5 year old knows that...not sure). and then you said, "For boys, it would be just like drinking out of a drinking fountain!" HAHAHA.

Fav toy: Samantha

 Fav fruit: pineapple

Fav movie: Frozen 2

Fav outfit: sparkly red dress

Fav game: Hoot Owl Hoot

Fav food: Mac'n'cheese

Fav animal: cats

 Fav song: Into the Unknown

 Fav book: Sofia and the Curse of Princess Ivy

 Best friend: Allison

 Fav cereal: Honey Bunches

 Fav thing to do outside: Swing

 Fav drink: Chocolate milk

 Fav holiday: Christmas

Fav thing: bed

how will we celebrate your 6th bday day: well we will be in California with all our extended family and having a party at Oma's clubhouse- we are planning a bbq, park play, and some simple décor. we will probably make special cupcakes together. you planned this whole "March bday party" thing (Uncle Dave, Maddy, Olivia) in Cancun almost a whole year prior and just kept talking about it... so we are making it happen ;) 

What will you be when you grow up: a teacher

did i tell you? (from grandma)

notes that my mama wrote for me and gave to me on my 16th birthday. I wanted to write them down for you to have someday too <3 

dear Johanna.... did I tell you?? 

...now that you are almost grown- i look back and ask my self- did i tell you? 

did i tell you all that i meant to tell you- all that i felt was important? did i tell you- or was it lost in the shuffle of our everyday lives? the busy, full days- when i was teaching you, but didn't know it. 

what did i teach? was it strong? was it good? will it root you in something real that will allow you to grow with a firm and sound foundation? .... did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to love? 

not with a "fair weather" love, but with a love that builds others up- a love that accepts and cherishes- a love that encourages people to be the best they can be. 

not with a quick and changeable love...but with a love that brings strength and peace to your heart... did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to be thoughtful? not to be a martyr or a "doormat"- to be stepped on- but to be aware of other people and their needs. to meet others with an open mind and heart and within your own framework be able to "meet them halfway"...and, on occasion- to go the other half- joyfully... did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to be courteous and polite? not to display empty manners with no real meaning- but to live-out the courtesy that is born of caring. and to express this caring through the small formalities and the customs born of the years...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to look for ways to serve other people? to actively search for ways to give of yourself? there is much growth and satisfaction in being a part of something larger than yourself- and your life will be richer for knowing this...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to find a part of nature that you love? let it speak to you and know it intimately and well... perhaps it is a mountain peak, or a wind-swept beach or a companion animal. find your own- and in it find restoration and joy...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to be bold and confident? to be not afraid of the unknown- but to live your life to the fullest...and to meet each new experience with joy and anticipation. and...did i tell you to be cautious and discerning? to temper your daring and sense of adventure with good judgment and wise consideration?...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to maintain a sense of the past? to recall and to uphold all tha tis good and meaningful in your country- in your society- and in your family. to never be afraid to speak out when you don't believe or where there is room for improvement....work for what you believe but work in a positive way within a structure of order and reason...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to laugh? to dance? to sing? there is so much in life that is hard- but take it as it comes and practice finding the good...and always, always make time to laugh...did i tell you? 

...did i tell you to be creative? to make the effort- to explore the unique seed that is within you- find your creative spirit- nurture it, and let it grow...did i tell you? 

and...did i tell you the joy and challenge of being a woman? the joy of having a child- of knowing and sharing a new life? the satisfaction of making a home...the center- but not the limit for the lives of those you love....did i tell you the wonder of falling in love and sharing your life with a man who treasures you? the contentment of being in a lifetime committed relationship that can bless others and bring glory to God?...did i tell you? 

...did I tell you to always trust in the goodness of your Heavenly Father? there will always be disappointment, set-backs, and even heart-breaking losses...but your Creator loves you- and is working all things for good...did i tell you? you are created for eternity, not for time...so live like it... did i tell you? 

...did I tell you these things as we went along the way? if I did, then I am humbly grateful. if I did not- well then you must choose for yourself. your life is yours to build as you choose...and- did I tell you?? I hope it will be a good life.... 

I love you, forever... Mom